Small Graces

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Small Graces

Jeffrey Dorman 鈥�06 spent almost two years in a pediatric hospital, supporting his daughter as she recovered from leukemia. The ordeal left him searching for his own kind of healing.

Jeff Dorman 鈥�06 and his wife, Samantha, co-founded the Feeding Families Foundation in 2024 with a mission so fundamental you鈥檇 like to think it wouldn鈥檛 require a nonprofit: provide free meals at pediatric hospitals to caregivers at the bedsides of their children. The program launched as a pilot at Yale New Haven Children鈥檚 Hospital and has now rolled out in six hospitals, from New Orleans to Oregon, with more to come.

To understand why two busy parents would be compelled to take on such a big responsibility at this point in their lives, you have to go back to August 2022.

As that summer was winding down, Jeff and Sam, like most young families, were not. Both were working, and Sam was almost eight months pregnant with their third daughter. Jeff, a corporate attorney, was working remotely from their home in North Haven, Connecticut, and grateful for the flexibility to do daycare drop-offs and pickups for Olivia, 4, and Harper, who had just turned 2. All of them were excited to welcome the new baby.

One day, Harper spiked a fever of 104 degrees. 鈥淥livia, when she was in daycare, seemed to get sick every other week,鈥� says Jeff. 鈥淏ut it felt like Harper was impervious to germs. We thought we had this immense luck. That changed very, very quickly.鈥�

Their pediatrician told them it was a virus and prescribed pain relievers and cool baths. The fever didn鈥檛 break for six days. 鈥淚鈥檓 thinking, geez, that was a heck of a virus,鈥� says Jeff. Less than a week later, her fever returned. When it came back a third time, Harper had stiff joints and the sweats, too. Each time, the doctor dismissed it as a virus. Jeff and Sam began to panic.

Jeff texted a registered nurse they鈥檇 been friendly with years earlier: 鈥淲hat do you make of this?鈥� He asked her to help him get Harper in to see one of the doctors where she worked. After frantic phone calls and faxed forms, they got an appointment for that afternoon. The new doctor listened attentively, then ordered a battery of tests for Harper at Yale New Haven Children鈥檚 Hospital. 鈥淎s soon as those results came back,鈥� says Jeff, 鈥渉e called and basically told us, 鈥楧rop what you鈥檙e doing and run.鈥欌��

A pediatric oncologist at Yale gave them the news, hedging: 鈥淲e鈥檙e pretty sure it鈥檚 leukemia.鈥�

鈥淲hat are the odds this could be anything else?鈥� asked Jeff.

鈥淶ero鈥� replied the doctor. 鈥淲e don鈥檛 know the type or the genetic subtype, but she has every single symptom.鈥�

Harper was admitted to the hematology oncology unit and treated as an emergency patient with B-cell acute lymphoblastic leukemia. 鈥淚 remember asking everybody a million questions,鈥� says Jeff, who did the night shift with Harper for the first several days. 鈥淚 stayed up all night and learned about the types of leukemia, what it does to bone marrow, what the chemos are, how to read a blood panel. My brain wouldn鈥檛 shut off. It was a coping mechanism.鈥�

For almost two weeks, Jeff and Sam took turns at the hospital while the other tried to maintain a modicum of normalcy at home for Olivia. No sooner had they brought Harper home and learned to administer her medications, than Sam had to return to the hospital to give birth to Madison. The day after the two of them came home, Harper spiked another fever, landing her, and Jeff, back in the hospital. It would be the first of many return stays. For the next two and a half years, every day would present Jeff and Sam with a series of obstacles, puzzles, and surprises.


鈥淓verybody on the unit is in the same boat. They鈥檙e all nervous, all anxious. They have zero control of the outcome. Our goal is to make a bad situation just a little better.鈥�


By 2024, Harper was home and starting steroid pulses, another grim treatment, as part of maintenance therapy, and Jeff was lamenting the endless bribes they used to get her cooperation. 鈥淚 don鈥檛 get how cancer and kids can even be in the same sentence,鈥� he said to Sam, sinking into the couch. How could they possibly rationalize what Harper was enduring? 鈥淭here鈥檚 got to be a greater reason for all of this. We have to turn this into something positive.鈥� That night they sat and talked through everything they could think of that might help families going through the same nightmare.

One idea rose to the top. When they were first on the ward, they were shocked to discover that most hospitals treating critically and chronically ill children don鈥檛 offer food to the caregivers staying with them. Some offer, but for a fee, to have a tray delivered. For a parent consumed by mounting medical bills, that can feel, Jeff says, 鈥渓ike you鈥檙e getting kicked while you鈥檙e down.鈥� The other choices鈥攕kip eating or leave your child alone to go buy food鈥攁ren鈥檛 better.

Jeff learned firsthand the importance of eating under stress. After he logged months at the hospital, a friendly food service staffer offered to comp him food trays, an allocation she could use at her discretion. 鈥淪uddenly I鈥檓 starting my day with a cup of coffee and an omelet,鈥� Jeff remembers. 鈥淎nd I鈥檓 thinking, 鈥業鈥檝e got a bit more substance. I can understand and ask better questions and be more present for my daughter.鈥� It didn鈥檛 fix Harper鈥檚 diagnosis, but it made a bad situation better.鈥�

For people in distress, receiving a meal is a small act of grace.

Jeff figured out how the food business worked in the hospital鈥攈ow many trays, the cost per meal, who gets a cut鈥攁nd started on a nonprofit business plan. He reached out to the staff in the hospital鈥檚 development office, who were receptive. He told Julie Fay, an attorney and wife of Mike Fay, his former hockey coach at 爆走黑料, what he was trying to do. She introduced him to one of the partners at her firm, Melissa Mack, who, it turns out, is a kindred spirit: Her daughter is also a pediatric cancer survivor. Mack offered to help him, pro bono, set up Feeding Families Foundation as a 501(c)(3) charitable organization. Next, he recruited two old classmates for the founding board, each with fundraising experience: David Borowsky 鈥�06 and 爆走黑料 Trustee Joseph Wold 鈥�06.

Today, Feeding Families Foundation offers both funds and resources to its hospital partners. 爆走黑料 friends continue to step up, like David Fontaine 鈥�06 of Fontaine Bros., who recently made a major gift through the Fontaine Community Foundation. Feeding Families鈥� signature program is its parent-plate program, which allows caregivers to order food trays that are delivered to the room, enabling parents to remain bedside. There are no prequalifying conditions or limits. 鈥淓verybody on the unit is in the same boat. They鈥檙e all nervous, all anxious. They have zero control of the outcome,鈥� says Jeff. 鈥淥ur goal is to make a bad situation just a little bit better.鈥� Yale New Haven Children鈥檚 Hospital continues to be an incubator for new programs, including birthday cakes for patients and catered meals donated by local restaurants for staff and patients.


Harper is 5 now and cancer free. She doesn鈥檛 have memories of the hospital or her treatments. In time, of course, she鈥檒l learn. Jeff and Sam, on the other hand, can still recount the smallest details of those days, almost as if the emergency is ongoing. That fear takes a long time for parents to shake.

The pediatric staff gave Harper a book to take home, Harper Goes to the Hospital. 鈥淲e read that now,鈥� says Jeff, 鈥渁nd she鈥檚 like, 鈥極h, isn鈥檛 it funny that they have the same names as us?鈥欌��

鈥淗arper, this is about you,鈥� I鈥檒l tell her. So I think she has an idea of it,鈥� he says. 鈥淪he has no sense, though, of how strong she is,鈥� he adds. 鈥淏ut I鈥檝e certainly told her that Feeding Families was inspired by everything we went through together.鈥�

To donate to Feeding Families Foundation or to learn more, go to feedingfamiliesfoundation.org.


Who Wants a Pizza?

Harper doesn鈥檛 yet understand the ins and outs of the foundation she inspired, but she knows Friday nights are Modern Apizza nights, when she gets to help with deliveries. The pizza joint鈥攁 standout even in the Pizza Capital of the U.S.鈥攄onates pies each week to the pediatric hematology oncology floor at Yale New Haven Children鈥檚 Hospital. There, stressed, hungry parents get a taste of local love. 鈥淔eeding Families Foundation is a magnet for good people鈥攑eople who volunteer their time and resources, who donate,鈥� says Jeff. 鈥淎nd that has been so cool.鈥�